Not All Soldiers Are Angels

Today is the first day back to work after the holidays.  Hard to be in a bad mood because I'm wearing fabulous boots!  It's the little things....

I had a few people take a look at the first post and their responses were the same, "Get out!"  I'm writing to clarify that I am in the process of leaving El Douche but the process is delayed when he is thousands of miles away.  There are both pluses and minuses to having a spouse deployed.  The plus is that the bastard is far, far away.  The minus is that he can't be served.  My lawyer told me, and I quote, "I thought we served him already," when I asked how far the divorce had proceeded prior to his leaving.  Yeah, that's the confidence builder I was seeking.  Some people with misguided patriotism may read this blog and feel sorry for my husband because he is a soldier and "fighting for our country" (he sits behind a desk, but whatever).  I would remind them that not all soldiers are angels, for example, the last time I checked, both Hitler and Genghis Khan were soldiers. 

This blog is a complilation of memories from the past and daily thoughts.  I write about the past because if I don't put words to paper (web page), I will drown in them.  For over a decade, I was alone with the way he treated me.  I don't know if I'll ever find the proper words to express the disgust and incredulation at standing by his side at church or military functions knowing what he truly was, pretending the entire time that we were the lovely family we appeared to be.  Only one time did a crack show.  When we were stationed overseas, I was standing in my driveway, waiting to get into the family vehicle.  He was frustrated about something.  Back then, he was more so than any other duty location.  He came around the side of the car, towered over me and started screaming obscenities, calling me "bitch", etc...   I think he did it because he thought none of our foreign neighbors would understand.  I don't think they needed to know the words, although I'm certain they did, to understand the tone of his voice.  At the same time, my military OB/GYN was walking his dog past our house and heard the whole thing.  At my next weekly doctor's visist he asked me if I felt "safe at home" and if there was anything I wanted to tell him.  That was the extent of the help from my doctor.  As the doctor and my husband were both Army and as we all attended the same church, what I assume is that he was trying to protect my husband's career.  The doctor certainly wasn't protecting me or the baby.